Happy New Year!

I wish you a very Happy, Healthy and Successful New Year!

I hope all problems we all encountered will remain in 2012 and 2013 will be a much better and prosperous year. 

Peace at Home, Peace on Earth!

courtesy of designtutorial.com

More on my Goals of 2013

As a part of my 2013 goals, Mom and I decided to start a diet and not tell anyone. She is planning to spend most of the winter with me. We shall go see a dietician (covered by our Social Security) and support each other. She will need to return to Ankara to have a cataract surgery in March. Until then, we are not telling anyone that we will be doing this. Hopefully, we shall lose enough weight to surprise my sister by then.

We plan to go for long walks when the weather permits it, use the stationary bike at home and some home exercise DVDs. I think support is the most important thing when you are trying to get rid of debt or lose weight. So, I am hoping we will benefit from this undertaking:)

Since we shall not eat out much, this will also help our budget.

Goals 2013

I was very hesitant to establish financial goals this year because of the irregular income stream I have to deal with for the first time in my life but, I did it anyway. I just kept the consultancy income estimate at a very modest level and found out that, it may be a tight year. I am glad that I sat down to make these calculations because, honestly I was not thinking it would be tight at all. It always pays to do the math I guess. Of course, the consultancy income may be more than what I estimated but, that is not something I will count on.

So, here are my goals:

1. Contribute the maximum to retirement that will be matched by the Government by 25% from Feb.13-Dec.13.
2. Have a mini vacation with Mom.
3.Have a vacation with friends from the US if they can make it to Turkey this year. (This may be a little on the expensive side but, I am thinking of ways to make it affordable already).
4. Have the apartment painted.(Not a big ticket item).
5. Keep on paying the rental apartment debt.

I had posted that I would work on Thursday and Friday and was  very happy about that. Unfortunately, the Customer postponed the scheduled visit. No big deal but still...

Can you say "No"?

I chatted with an old friend of mine couple of days ago over a cup of coffee. For a long time, I have always thought that her family was taking advantage of her just because she is a really really nice person. They step on her like a door mat all the time and I have known her for over 20 years. To me, it is sad.

As usual she was complaining about her sister and her parents and suddenly I realized that, her family is not the real problem. It is her inability to say "No". She feels bad when she refuses them so she almost never declines anything.

There is nothing wrong with saying "no" when you do not want to do something. I am not talking about being selfish here. I am just saying if you will feel bad about something later and resent it, do not accept it in the first place. There is only so much one person can do within her/his schedule, abilities, patience and stamina. It is absolutely OK to say "no" when you know you need to.

I never had her kind of problems with my family because I think we all have a sense of sharing the load when things must be done. Besides, we can openly tell each other whether we can do something or not without getting anybody's feelings hurt. We know and accept what each other likes and dislikes. This does not mean we do not argue, we do but, we never stop talking to each other or apologize.

I love my family to the moon and back but that does not mean that I would always accept anything and everything they may ask. I know they feel the same and it's OK.

Why do people save things for special occassions?

Today mom showed me a beautiful leather handbag that I had given her more than 20 years ago. She never used it because, she saved it for special occassions and perhaps forgot it for some time. The bag must have cost me the half of my salary back then.

She asked me if I would like to have it and I said "Well since that you are not using it why not?"

I am not upset. Over the years I bought many things for mom and she used most of them till they basically fell apart.

However, I have a problem with saving beautiful things for special occassions. When is a better time than now?

When I was a kid, many people had a "guest room". Some people still do. That usually was the largest room of the house originally intended to be the family room. It would be expensively furnished and decorated and would be kept closed most of the time. The room would be barely used and some women even covered the furniture with throws or sheets so that the furniture wouldn't get dusty or fade.  Even as a kid, that was such a stupid thing for me. After all, why shouldn't I enjoy the best room and best furnishings that I can afford?

Who knows how long we shall live or how long we will have the good health to enjoy our belongings?

Update on the Family Situation

I came to Ankara last week and stayed with sis and BIL. Mom was already staying with them, cooking and keeping them company.

Yesterday we came back to my mom's home.

Things were looking good as far as her MIL and FIL were concerned until last night. Last night the MIL had another massive stroke wiping out all the progress she has made in the last two months. She was at a therapy  center when the stroke came, so they immediately notified my sister and her husband and transferred the patient with an ambulance to the hospital. Her MIL is now in ICU and her situation is critical.
Everyone is devastated. Such a horrible day...

Happy Holidays!

courtesy of designtutorial.com

Merry Christmas!

Happy Hanukkah!

Happy New Year!

Peace at home, peace on earth!