Progress on my New Eating Plan

I do not want to jinx it but, I must say, I am doing pretty well with my eating plan. I always knew I had a problem with portion sizes rather than eating junk food and sweets. Now that I am measuring everything I put on my plate, I believe, I must have been eating like a monster. Especially when it comes to pasta, I was eating way too much. Well, now I don't eat any. I have insulin resistance and I am not supposed to eat any pasta, anything that has white flour, rice, potatoes etc. The only thing I am allowed is bulgur pilaf and only sparingly.

I could not go to my control appointment due to work. My next appointment with the dietician is going to be on April 10th or 11th. I should be able to weigh 12 pounds less. I think, 4-5 pounds of that must have been water retention, but still, it is great progress. I am almost down 9 pounds now.

Today, I had another two egg omelette with cheese and dillweed along with some cherry tomatoes. For lunch I had brussel sprouts, yogurt and two slices of organic whole wheat bread.

For a snack, I had coffee with milk and three dates. Dates are full of fiber and satisfy the need for something alongside coffee.

For dinner, I am having half a fillet of a sea bream with salad. The other half is for tomorrow. In the past I would have eaten the whole fish.

Now, I have to walk on the treadmill for a half hour and take a shower. I have some work to do before and after dinner.

I have two social gatherings this week; one lunch with ex-boss and office assistant and, dinner with old HS buddies. Both on the same day! Yikes! I have to survive eating out while on a diet or else, I will need to give up outings which would really be upsetting.

Lazy Saturday

Got up late today. Didn't feel like doing anything much so, I just chilled. Then I took a nice long shower, dressed and went to meet an old colleague and his wife for dinner. We had a very nice time and I stuck to my diet. Yay me!

Tomorrow, I will go vote and grab a couple of things from the grocery store. I guess, I am not very good in planning my shopping. There is always something I forget. I also do not buy in multiples. That is stupid so, tomorrow, I will get multiple items that I consume all the time. There is a kind of cottage cheese that I am eating these days since the white cheese is salty and I am having BP problems again. I will also buy more of the dried apricots and dates. I have 3 apricots or dates every day with my afternoon tea/coffee.

It was very cold and windy today but, looks like it will gradually warm up a bit in a week.

Hope, everyone is having a nice and relaxing weekend.

Happy Blogoversary To Me!

This is the 10th year of my blog! Wow!

I had periods of long absences and times when I lost my interest in writing but, I am still here!

Beginning of Tulip Season in Istanbul - Photos!

The cleaning lady came in at 9:30 and I was out the door by 10:30. I don't like being home while it is cleaned. I told her about all the food in the fridge and that she was welcome to eat whatever she fancied. When I came back home, she was about to leave and told me that, I was a good cook. Nice!

I had planned to go to this park where they have lots and lots of nice tulips this time of the year and I also wanted to get a a light brunch. I parked a little farther from one of the entrances to the park and walked all the way to the other entrance where I could have some breakfast. I took lots of pictures. I think, we need another week of good weather for all the tulips to come out. So, I should definitely go back.

I then walked past my car towards the shoreline and strolled around a bit and sat in the sun. It was cold but nice. I then went to a mall to get cash. I also needed to buy garlic and walnuts.

I am sharing some of the pictures I have taken but, they do not do justice to the beautiful flowers. The colors were a lot brighter and really lovely:

Productive and Fun Day! + Photos

Today, I went to get my lab tests done early in the morning. I was in and out within 15 minutes. Then I went to get breakfast at Starbucks. A latte and a small cheese sandwich was a welcome change.

Then I went to get veggies and a fruit. Got sugar snap peas, swiss chard, fresh fava beans, artichokes red beets and strawberries.

I pickled most of the red beets leaving two small ones to be shredded in a salad. I cooked the fresh fava beans with the artichokes and sauteed the swiss chard with onions. A handful of sugar snap peas were set aside for tonight's dinner. Rest was cooked with minced/chopped meat. In a few minutes, I will get up to make bulgur pilaf. Now, that is a lot of food but, tomorrow, the cleaning lady is coming. She comes in having had her breakfast at home and I serve lunch. Mostly, I ordered something but now that I am home and that I cook, I can serve her the same food that I made. After lunch, I will freeze what I think I cannot consume within 2-3 days. I have already frozen the swiss chard in two portion size containers.

I had stir fried sugar snap peas and broccoli with broiled Sea Bream for dinner. It did hit the spot. Here is a picture: (It is not a whole fish, just one side of it)

After I make the bulgur pilaf, I will set things in order in the kitchen so that, tomorrow it can be cleaned properly. That is why I proceesed most of the food I have on hand.

I felt very energetic today. I kept a Spotify list of 80's disco tunes on and had lots of fun as I cooked. Those songs were really cheerful. I am glad, I thought of that.

Here is a picture of the pickled red beets, artichokes and fresh fava beans, sauteed swiss chard:

Here are a couple of pictures of my kitchen.

Totally Jinxed It!

I thought Spring has sprung but alas! Winter is back. The sun is shining, the sky is blue but, brrrrr! it's cold out there!

Today, I went to see an endochrinologist. I have lab tests tomorrow. I am hoping that she might help me in losing weight. She talked about bariatric surgery but, I really do not want to go that route. She talked about a medicine and I am skeptical about those too.

I want to focus on losing weight by my own effort. Anyway, we'll see.

Went to get my prescription meds and made a short trip to the small grocery store to pick up broccoli, yogurt, fresh fish and some canned tuna on sale.

I will get more veggies from the farmer's market tomorrow. Need cherry tomatoes, cucumbers and anything in season. Fresh artichokes are out but, they are still expensive. Need to give it another couple of weeks.

I walked almost 5.000 steps but, I will get on the treadmill. Feeling very energetic today. Looking forward to weighing in on Monday. My scale is a bit off (weighs more) but, I am sure the dietician's scale is calibrated.

The work is still slow but, I will get a bit busy next week.

Hope, everyone has a great weekend!

Frugality and a Healthy Diet

A lot of people are concerned that a healthy diet might be very expensive. I do not know if that is true in other countries but, in here it is not expensive at all.

First of all, I do not eat outside as much as I used to. That is a big savings. I guess some people in other countries might have access to Dollar Menus at McDs and stuff like that but, I normally did not eat fast food at all. So, if I eat even a salad in a regular restaurant, that is a lot of money. I am picky about the places I eat because of hygiene reasons. I buy a whole package of salad greens and two pounds of tomatoes for the price of a salad at a restaurant. Those will last me a whole week.

Second, portion control keeps you from eating too much anyway. A good steak is expensive. Normally, I would eat the whole big piece in one sitting. However, I now have to cut that in half for portion control. I also use red meat sparingly for a heart healthy diet and that helps with the costs. I use only EVOO in my cooking and that is expensive too. However, now I have to measure how much I use. I use probably a third of what I would normally use. There you go again.

There are lots of produce that I need to buy. I buy seasonal items with the exception of tomatoes and cucumbers to keep the costs down. I can eat only one portion of fruit and I eat seasonal fruits.

I eat all sorts of beans and they are very inexpensive especially, if you buy them dry. Soaking them overnight is no hassle.

I normally consume a lot of cheese bu,t with the diet you can only eat controlled portions.

Here is what I have in my diet:

Whole wheat bread (limited number of slices)

Lean cuts of meat, fish, poultry (the size of the palm of my hand, my pinky thick)

Salad, lots of salad, tomatoes, cucumbers, carrots...

Vegetables

Cheese (we have a feta like white cheese not as sharp)

Plain Yogurt (1 cup per day)

Milk (max. 1.5 cups per day)

Fruit (sparingly, medium orange, apple etc.)

Water

Coffee

For me, diet soda is a treat. I allow myself to have a maximum of 3 cans per week. Not more. Artificial sweeteners are not good so, I keep away.

There aren't any exotic specific ingredients in my above list. Very basic stuff. So, this eating plan also keeps my budget at a minimum. Win-win in my book!

Weight going down

I must report that, my weight is going down since I started this new eating plan on the 12th of March.  I am not sticking to it 100% but, I am making sure I do not eat more than what is on the plan. Sometimes I do not eat the fruit but have an extra slice of bread or cheese. It still seems to work.

I cannot walk 40-45 minutes yet. Instead I walk for about 20 minutes and then do some exercises with an elastic band.

I am hoping that I will keep up with this. For inspiration, I am watching the TLC show where some of the patients lose 90-100 pounds before the bariatric surgery. I am not anywhere morbidly obese like that but these people have the worst eating habits. I already have better eating habits so, with portion control and a little effort, I should be able to drop a good deal of weight.

I am going on my BIG VACATION late October. Until then, I would like to lose at least 26 pounds.

I made an Excel Chart so that I can motivate myself. Visual aids do help. For years, I have been tracking my finances through visual aids too.

I will weigh in on Monday. We'll see what the dietician will say.

Errands and Chores

Today I needed to go to the bank to have them scan my new ID for their records. The new IDs have chips on them and they are smaller just like a driver's license or a credit card. Old ones were bigger. Now I need tı get a health report and apply for the new driver's license. That also has a chip. I do not know why we need both things. A DL or an ID should be sufficient but who knows why...

After that I went to get salad greens, tomatoes, yogurt and a few other small necessities. The weather was beautiful and I did not need a jacket going out.

I have dusted and vacuumed two rooms over the weekend but I could not get around doing anything else today except for cleaning up the kitchen thoroughly, folding and putting away the laundry. Tomorrow is going to be a busy day.

I am going to meet some friends in the afternoon on Wednesday. They are from my High School. I did not know them back then but, we got to be friends over the last few years during the yearly get togethers. One is an architect who teaches at a College, the other is an artist.

My diet is going pretty well. I weighed myself today and am pleased with the result. I should make a control apointment with the dietician. May be Monday...

Home sweet and dirty home...

As I have guessed my uncle is not going to the doctor since he started taking the meds again. Go figure! We possibly cannot make a 61 year old man go to the doctor unless he wants to. So, whatever will be, will be... 

My apartment is a mess. The cleaning lady could not make it last week. Normally she would have shown up this week but she was busy again. She will come next week hopefully. However, I must set things in order, dust and vacuum no later than this Monday or else, I will drive myself crazy.

Tomorrow I will change my sheets dust and vacuum my bedroom, the spare bedrrom and do some laundry.

I went grocery shoping today and bought fresh fava beans (just like string beans) and some kale. The fresh beans were cooked in the pressure cooker the usual way. Sautee cubed onions, season to taste, add tomato paste or sauce, dump the veggies and cook. We, the Turks cook almost all vegetables and even meats like this. We do have a lot of other methods of cooking but this is the simplest. We serve veggies warm or cold. People cook with butter or margarine for warm dishes and olive oil for cold. I exclusively cook with EVOO.

I chopped the kale and sauteed it with lots of cubed onions. I will have both dishes with garlic yogurt sauce. I have 4 portions of veggies in the fridge now. I also have a portion of frozen stir-fried veggies for Friday. So, I am all set. I am supposed to have a veggie dish for lunch or dinner every day. The other meal is protein heavy. For protein, there are three portions of chicken breast, 4 portions of meat patties in the freezer. However, I intend to have chick peas for two meals this week. Protein does not need to be meat all the time.

Since, I have processed the veggies, I was able to clean the kitchen halfway thru. Tomorrow, I will take care of the rest. Right now, there is pot on the stove for veggie broth. I learnt that by reading American blogs. I don't think anybody else does that here in this country.

When I was working full time, the kitchen was never used this much. I am sure the dishwasher is shocked that it gets to work almost every day. I am not a big fan of handwashing the dishes you see.

Oh I purged some unused plates and some kitchen utensils along with some candle holders. Instead of doing one big cleanup, I get rid of things slowly as I come by them. Works for me.

Next few days the weather is expected to be real good again so, if I can get up early tomorrow, I will go to the shoreline to walk. If not, cleaning the apartment will be my exercise.

Food and Creativity and Family Matters

I think there are times when we just have to wing it when it comes to food. I hate wasting food although I have badly burnt two slices of bread today. Well...

I made a salad for today's lunch and realized that my salad greens are no longer in the best shape. However, I am not feeling like eating another salad  made from the same stuff tonight. So, I chopped a small onion and sauteed the greens. I know they are salad greens but who cares? I have meat patties for tonight and I will have the sauteed greens as a bed for them.

I must go grocery shopping tomorrow which I am not looking forward to. Saturdays are so crowded. I hope, I can get up early and be done with it quickly. I wasn't in the mood to go today.

My sister called me today saying that my uncle was having a high blood pressure problem and that his nose was bleeding. So, I called mom up and inquired about it. It turned out that the idiot (lovingly said) has given up one of his meds thinking that he no longer needed it because his blood pressure was normal. This man has seen his grandma and his very own mother, my grandma have strokes due to high blood pressure. Both of them became bed ridden and suffered a long time. Not only that, but he is also a Pharmacist. He should know thet the normal BP is due to properly administered meds and this thing is really never cured. BP and Thyroid diseases are genetic in our family. Sigh...

Later in the day, I called them up and found out that his bleeding got worse and he could not go to the doctors. Instead, they called the emergeny hotline and medics helped him advising strongly that he should see his doctor. My sister and my BIL are going over to Ankara tonight to see what's going on. Mom says a friend of my uncle is gonna take him to a doctor on Monday. Hope, he does go. He is such a stubborn person, you can never know.

My family is really small. Mom, sis, BIL, uncle, two cousins (their dad was my older uncle who passed), cousins' mother, BIL's parents and me. All of 10 people. The youngest is 43,  four of them are over 70 and almost everybody has important health problems. So, we should take good care of ourselves to be able to help each other when needed. One of these 10 people will have to bury everyone... Oh boy...

Dreary, cold day, cramps and cravings

Today is yet another wet and cold day. No sun. Bummer.

I still had to wak out to get sanitary napkins. I was all out because I thought, I was in menapause and wasn't gonna get another period because, I did not get one since August 2018. Human body has lots of surprises I guess. Luckily there is a small grocery store right by me.

I am in a grumpy mood because I was hoping to clean up my home a little bit. I have cramps and I am feeling uncomfortable so, no cleaning or vacuuming today.

I also have cravings for chocolate but I am not destroying day 2 of my new eating plan. I had two thin slices of pineapple to satisfy my sweet tooth.

Tonight, I am having a nice big salad and meat patties. There is a little bit of mixed veggies (eggplant, zucchini, string beans and tomatoes) leftover. Instead of having a slice of bread, I will have that. I do not have to cook today or tomorrow. Just need to fix salads. That's all.

Anyway, the work is starting to pick up pace again. I would like to bring in as much extra money as I can until October. Ideally, I would like to finance my big vacation entirely by the extra income from consulting but, we shall see.

I will be done with the payments of the family home on September 2nd. There are only 6 payments left and that is a great thing. I cannot wait to see that. I am hoping to fix the roof this year

Where did the Spring go?

Today was a cold, dreary day. Well, the last three days were awesome and nothing lasts forever, right?

I was home which desperately needs a good cleaning but, I did not feel like doing it. Had a bad night with insomnia again.

I went on the treadmill and walked while watching an old episode of Star Trek Next Generation. After the exercise, I enjoyed a nice cup of coffee and an apple.

I found some unused china and I am going to place them outside tomorrow with a notice that says: Free to take. While I was looking in the china cabinet, I found a brand new small frying pan. I was thinking of discarding the old one and BUYING one. I did not even know that it was there. God knows when I bought it. I use that size pan for making an omelette or frying eggs for breakfast.

Tomorrow, I intend to gather all the spare light bulbs and look for white lights which I will put outside for people to take. I do not like white lights and never use them but apparently I bought  some by mistake.

Tomorrow, I have a meeting with a Customer so, I must get up at 7 a.m.

First day of the Diet: Check! I did everything right.

Off I went to the dietician!

Lately,I have realized that my weight is spiraling out of control. Due to my insomnia, I cannot go to sleep at a normal humanly hour so, I get hungry and eat late at night. Not good.

I know every detail about a healthy diet and how I can lose weight but, putting that knowledge into action is another story. So, I decided to see a dietician for accountability reasons.

Every month I will pay 95 TL, about 17-18 Dollars US which is very cheap since most of the cost is covered by Social Security. For this miniscule amount of money, I get to see the dietician and weigh in every two weeks. She gave me her mobile phone number in case I may crave something, may be in need to go out or stuff like that. That is actually very nice.

She also told me to take it easy with the exercise. She doesn't want me to be sedentary but she says for now, 30-45 minutes of a walk for three days a week is enough. I was also told to drink a ton of water. Not really, just about 2.5 liters or about 10 regular glasses a day. That is very doable because I already drink water quiet a bit.

She gave me a lot of food to eat but they are wholesome fresh foods so, let's see how I will do.

After the dietician I returned an item I had bought for the bathroom to a Home Depot like store. Then I went to IKEA to buy something else for the bathroom. I like how IKEA makes you walk all around the store even though you are there to look for or buy one thing. It is a marketing gimmick which does not bother me. I focused on what I needed to buy and did not purchase anything not needed. Also, by returning the other item and buying something else from IKEA, I was able to cut the cost in half. Plus, I walked more than 1500 steps in the store. Perfect!

In total I have walked close to 5,000 steps today. Good Job!

It is another beautiful and sunny day and I think I should pack away warm clothes pretty soon. Spring blossoms are everywhere and soon tulips will be covering Istanbul. I will surely share some pictures then.

Beautiful spring day...

I woke up around 10 a.m. today since I had another insomniac night. I prepared some tea, put it in my thermos and packed the couple slices of cheese pie along with a good book and off I went to the shoreline.

It was very crowded so, I did not dare to rent a bike this time.

I walked, had my brunch, walked some more, read my book, enjoyed the sunshine, watched the people who were out to enjoy the nice day.

7236 steps and 4 hours later, I came home, made a cup of Turkish Coffee and started typing this. It feels good. In an hour or so, I will hit the shower, read and rest some more till dinner time.

My dinner is ready; all I have to do is to fix a salad. So, I am all set for the day. On days like this, I feel that life is a blessing all through my bones.

Hope, everybody is having a great time this weekend.

Spring is in the air!

Today is a gorgeous day but I did not spend time outdoors as I should have. It was 62 degrees F, 17 degrees C.

Tomorrow I intend to get up early and go for a long walk by the sea. I will take a book with me so, when I feel tired, I can sit and rest a while. I intend to pack a small picnic brunch. I just made a cheese/onion/parsley pie by using fillo dough. I can pack a couple slices and a small thermos of tea.

I just snacked on a green aplle and a slice of gouda cheese with cumin seeds. Does that sound odd? It tastes good!

I will start seeing a dietician on Monday. I must focus on my health as I now have lots of time in my hands. I am trying to move as much as I can but that is not nearly enough. I will make a schedule to walk at least 30 minutes every day for two weeks and then, I will try to walk 30 minutes in the morning, 30 minutes in the afternoon.

I bought some chicken breasts and minced/chopped meat. I will make meat patties and freeze them today. I have salad fixings and the amount of food at home will last me at least a whole week if not more.

The cheese pie was something I missed lately and since, I will get back on a diet on Monday, I will have a few slices and freeze the rest although, it is a fairly healthy version.

Have a great weekend! Hope the weather is as good as it is in your neck of the woods.

Interesting Stats about a Few Countries

As I was replying to a comment to JJ from Canada, I came across some interesting statistics so, I felt compelled to dig in further and prepared a summary below.

Population and Size of the Countries (per Wikipedia)

Population Km.Square Australia 25,279,500 7,692,024 Canada 37,242,571 9,984,670 Turkey 82,300,082 783,356 UK 66,040,229 242,495 USA 327,167,434 3,796,742

I did not know how small the population of Australia and Canada were, so, that was quiet amazing information for me.

Also, I did not know that the UK was more densely populated than Turkey.

How about the Currency Exchange rates? (per Central Bank of Turkey March 6, 2019)

1 Australia Dollar		3.77 TL
1 Canada Dollar		4.02 TL
1 UK Pounds Sterling		7.06 TL
1 USA Dollar		5.38 TL

Gas Prices (GlobalPetrolPrices.com) per LITER quoted in USD March 4, 2019

Australia		0.97 USD/lt.
Canada		0.93 USD/lt.
Turkey		1.23 USD/lt.
UK		1.54 USD/lt.
USA		0.72 USD/lt.

United Kingdom seems to be the most expensive but, the standard of living in Turkey and the UK are very different so, it is safe to say that we are using the most expensive gas in here.

And here is one amusing stat: Amount of tea consumption per person per year! (www.theatlantic.com)

Australia		1.65 lb/person
Canada		1.12 lb./person
Turkey		6.9 lb./person
UK		4.28 lb./person
USA		0.50 lb./person

As a tourist you can do very well in Turkey unless you rent a car and drive long distances. You can drink lots and lots of tea too:) I must admit I am not one of the people contributing much to the tea statistics. I doubt if I consume two pounds a year. I do drink more coffee. Probably four pounds a year.

What do you think of the statistics?

Idiot Mobile Operator!

A while ago, I was contacted by my mobile operator about my contract being up today and they offered me the same package MINUS 5 GB of Internet at a small price bump. Why? Lesser package, higher price? Can anyone care to explain?

Anyway, I really do not need that much data and minutes so, I told them I no longer need that big expensive package and I would be content with a smaller one. They said that is the smallest package they can offer. As this conversation was going on I was looking at their website on my computer. There are smaller and much more interesting plans that they can offer for newcomers but not to current customers. Being a loyal customer is penalized. Really? So, I hung up without comitting to a new package.

I sent them an e-mail explaining the situation and asked for help. Two useless e-mails later, I decided to change my operator. This one is not better than the other by any means but at least, they treat me as a newcomer and I can get to choose a plan more to my liking. This is going to be a 1 year contract so, most likely, I will keep on going back and forth between operators to be able to use a plan I like. There is a third operator but I am not sure about their coverage. May be next time I am gonna try them.

Today I went to the nearest mall where there is this operator's rep office and got my new SIM card. In the next 5 days, my operator will be changed. It took me less than 10 minutes to process my request amd there!

I will be paying 35 TL instead of 96 monthly. The 96 TL plan has 15 GB of Internet, 2000 minutes and 2000 sms. I surely do not need that. When I was working full time and had a second apartment with no TV, it was a need (may be). Now, 3 GB of Internet and 500 minutes are more than enough.

What an idiotic wat to treat a customer...

Perseverance for Success

As I was channel surfing yesterday, I came across the Simone Biles story and enjoyed watching it. Today, I watched Borg vs McEnroe.

Both movies made me realize that all of these athletes faced difficulties when they were young. Their families or coaches helped them move through rough patches and they all became very successful at the end. Quitting was not an option for any of them. They worked on their problems. Borg for instance had anger issues. Imagine that! The guy was called Ice Man. So, he was able to deal with it.

I think, I prefer to quit when push comes to shove in many occassions. I have changed several jobs because I felt stuck, I gave up exercise and diets many times because I don't know why.

If people were all like me, I guess we would not have Edison, Albert Einstein, Da Vinci, Malala Yousafzai, Venus and Serena Williams, Socrates, Vincent Van Gogh and many more who excelled in their passion. These people had all sorts of troubles from dyslexia, disadvantages, health problems, injuries, to people who outright went after them to kill. However, they persevered.

Yet, I think most people are like me and the above are just extraordinary. Why is that? What makes a person never to give up a goal or a dream?

Same thing with finances too. Thank God, I have done fairly well in this but it could have been much better if I had more patience.

Just a Saturday post

My shower doors were installed yesterday. Two guys showed up on time which was a nice surprise. It took them less than an hour. They told me not to use the shower for 24 hours. The silicone they used smelt really bad. So, I put a plate of baking powder and some vinegar in a wide mouth container. I also lit a couple of nice scented candles. It is much better today.

Yesterday, I worked on a new project and participated in a teleconference.

It is very cold and cloudy today but, I must move so, I am thinking of doing some beginner tai-chi movements with YouTube and may be walk for a half hour on the treadmill. It has been more than 24 hours since the shower door installation and I can take a nice long shower.

I do not have to cook today but, I must take some frozen meat out for tomorrow. I am thinking grilling chicken breasts to go with a salad. Last time I bought chicken breasts, I had cut them up and put them in ziplock bags. It is very easy to let them thaw and marinate in the bag. I have some frozen veggie dishes too. So, I do not think I need to shop till Wednesday or so. I do need bread and milk though.

My friend's wife called me to say that he is out of surgery and it went well. He is still sleeping. I think this time it was the other carotide artery plus a by-pass. No details just yet.

Unexpected Upsetting News

A friend of mine, an ex-co-worker had been hospitalized and he has already been in one surgery. His next surgery will be tomorrow and another will be within a month. All his major arteries are clogged including both his carotid arteries. He is in good hands and his wife and his son are taking very good care of him.

I talked to him yesterday and he was fine, doing some work in his hospital bed.

I like his wife as much as I like him so, today I called her to see how she is doing because taking care of a loved one is a tough job and the caregivers need empathy, encouragement and the feeling that they are also cared about as well.

As I was talking to her, I mentioned how I will go visit them once this ordeal is over and suddenly she said, she wouldn't be there at the house where they have moved to after retirement. I did not get it at first, thinking she was joking but, then she said that they are separated and will soon be getting a divorce. My mouth must have remained open for several minutes.

They have a young adult son who lives in Europe and these two seemed like a happy and dedicated couple. I always thought they have been very lucky to have found each other.

I am so sad about this. She told me a few things and her heart is broken for good reason. However, she says she still loves him as a friend and the father of her son and that she will take care of him through his recovery. I thought, may be they could work things out but, she says it is time to let go. They have both tried very hard but apparently my ex-co-worker has some anger issues which I never knew and he is reluctant to seek help.

I could not be more upset. I just wish them well the rest of their lives. May be this will be better for both of them, may be not, who knows?